Oddness...

So I'm in one of those strange moods, when you know you are confused and kind of upset, but you're not 100% positive why it is and what you can do about it! On the other hand I have found myself getting more and more excited at the prospect of leaving for Uni! Don't get me wrong, I will be sad to leave behind all the people I love... and those that I don't... because it has been the most farmiliar thing for 18 years now. But with a new adventure I will be able to find out more about myself and more about who my true friends are! I promised myself I wouldn't do this sorta crap in a blog for so many to read... not that the people who 'matter' will be reading it... but still. It is rather strange. Yet I cannot seem to stop the words coming out my fingers onto the keyeboard. I also promised myself that I would make it as coherent and as non-random as possible, in order to make sure that it relates to the reason I began the blog... However, I seem to have borken both these promises in the matter of 2 paragraphs, as this entry has no real purpose or subject. Ok.. a subject.... a subject.........! Well, there is always my mums wedding to consider. Considering that it is less than 3 weeks away AND I have to make a cake in that time I am relatively calm. I also have to think about writing a speech, which one one hand seems relatively easy, but my fear is that it will turn out something like this entry... a babbling, incoherent mess! I should just say what I feel! But that runs the risk of sounding cheesy! I understand that they are my family and friends that I am talking to, and they already know how much of a berk I am, but I don't want to give them anymore ammuntion towards my already established stupidity and soppyness! See, I have always been gifted in my ability to write rather formally and inkeeping with the purpose, in order to make sure that people think I am well versed and like I understand what I am talking about. But when it comes to something like this, which is a happy occasion that you can celebrate with your family and friends, you want to be able to make sure that it means something, opposed to just words that make sense and express how you feel. To me there is a difference between writing to evoke feeling and writing cos you know you have to. The speech falls into the former!... Oh how interesting it must be to live inside my head hey?!?! On that note I will 'leave' you before I pour the ENTIRE contents of my brain onto a small page, resulting in many of you leaving feeling depressed and suicidal! Now comes the time for dreams of this cake and the formation of a speech which must be read aloud in less than 3 weeks. G'night All x

So I was thinking...

Ok... So some people think this is not that good a thing to do, or sad, or whatever else they think. But I was thinking about it a couple of days ago and wondered that since I got my new laptop (Way to go Me!) that perhaps, taking into account how amazingly huge this year is going to be, should I start a blog?!?! It all started on August 20th at 6.15am! This was the exact time I recieved my results and my laptop. It was what I had thought about for such a long time. Every time I thought about teaching the children, or having my own class room, or sitting up untill 2am writing reports, I get this excited feeling in my stomach. A sense of purpose that I will one day have! Feeling like I can make a difference to just one child, and if it is only 1 I am doing my job! However, I digress, as all this is in the future, considering I have only just got my place at Uni! So, as I was saying, i found out I got my place at Uni and my mum presents me with this large box... I look... I realise... I scream... A laptop! A brand new, shiney, funky-covered laptop! And it's ALL mine! So I descover I have a blog button on the NEW laptop and decide that I should perhaps look at starting one, as it will possibly help me remember what went on these last two days. Which brings me to this point here. 4 Weeks untill I have to move into halls and leave all my friends! In particular the closest ones I have made in the past year! If I completely honest, most of me says that it is time for a new start. A new start away from all the drama that is caused on a weekly basis. A new start to be the person I became during my A Level years! Standing on my own two feet (which I can do fairly well anyway), without depending on my mum for emotional support! Woah! I have just read that back and now see how incredibly cheesy that all is... like I am going to burst into song or pour out my heart story. So on that note I will 'sign off'? Is that what ya d0? I need to learn the 'blogging' lingo! Hmmmmm... Night all!